Gurgitations

In December of 2001, the world was given a taste of the Segway, the self balancing scooter. For quite some time leading up to that unveling, speculation loomed large about what the “IT” project, by legendary inventor Dean Kamen, could be. People guessed everything from anti-gravity machines to personal jetpacks, frictionless skateboards, and other types of imaginary machines. Steve Jobs saw an actual Segway, and allegedly said,

“If enough people see the machine, you won’t have to convince them to architect cities around it”

Well, here we are, coming up on 6 years later. And low and behold, lil’ Stevie was wrong. It was not city architects who rejoiced, but low level authority figures who got excited.

Finally! “IT” was a chance to be nimbler and faster…

“IT” was a chance to catch up with the “bad” guys… without having to hire “fit” security guards.

“IT” was the opportunity to have an immediately “taller” workforce… and thus, more important.

Segways have probably transformed the lives of these low level authority figures more than anyone else. Just think about how much more efficient Park Rangers, Ticket Meter Agents, and Airport Security Guards have become with these fascinating machines. Not only are they faster and taller, but also they now have instant authority. Everyone knows height means “higher on the food chain.” Get back behind that nylon rope!

In recent years, Segways have unveiled their true purpose: human cattle herders.

Their riders: urban cowboys.

So I got to thinking about the group that the Segways ended up benefiting, and I saw a glaring “opportunity” in my own job. Thus, the subject of this post:

The Business Segway

Once you really start thinking about it, it is unbearable that Cubicle Architects around the world haven’t already opened up the prefabricated lanes of management criss-crossing our beloved workplaces.

A manager’s dream, this one really sells itself.

Think of the hourly rates your managers make… Now break down the time spent in daily cube farm promenades, roaming near and far to ask for status and projections. Now cut out at least an hour a day… 200 bucks per executive, instantly saved.

You’re welcome.

This is your instant solution.

• It’s a faster manager workforce: Do those rounds in speed and style.
• Instant management authority: Think tall workforces are only effective in Airport Security lines?? Think again. Tall managers are the rage. Just look at the leaders at top flight companies. Height=Authority.
• Credibility: What’s that, programmer? You don’t think I’m right about how long that should take you to finish? Well, I’ve got news for you. I’m a whole half foot taller than you, I can move with my mind, and I’m literally on an endless roll. Don’t make me get off this Segway and get my feet dirty (both puns intended).

Instant Savings. Instant Authority. And Finally, Workplace Efficiency.

As a follow up to the last post, I wanted to share another cool mobile interface I came across. Some researchers at a Microsoft and Mitsubishi electric research labs have created a mobile interface they’re calling “lucid touch”.

The prototype uses the back of the device as a multi-touch interface that you use with both hands as you grip the device. To let the user visualize what they’re doing, they’ve projected the user’s fingers onto the screen, creating a translucent effect where you see the shadows of your fingers moving behind the screen and interacting with it.

Using the dual touch screen, you can zoom in and out of a map by pulling out and pushing in your fingers, rotate the map by spinning the screen like a disk, and type using a keypad broken into two halves where the fingers naturally lie. Check out the demo below:

This is not a massive idea, and I’m going to keep this short as apparently my posts are a bit too “essay”-like in length.

I was playing with the iPhone at the Apple store yesterday, and the novelty of some of their tricks to make the interface feel natural got me thinking about more ways you might be able to make devices easier to use.
Continue reading »

A new age of social networking is coming… to your cell phone. I don’t know when, but I do know it will come. It will start secretly (to you) on high school and college kids’ phones. It will likely involve sharing something that you feel is far too private to be publicly posted all over the place online. It will grow, and you will see it spreading to seemingly every teenager’s phone. Then one day, your Mom will announce that she’s signed up, and you’ll realize that somewhere along the way, this thing really became a new way to communicate.

Continue reading »

A little while ago, I was reading up on Ruby on Rails and started thinking about database performance. Dynamic SQL that happens auto-magically is great, but should the application tier really always be pulling over a bunch of database records into memory everytime it needs to manipulate data? Even if that data never needs to be displayed? I thought there might be a way to save some of those roundtrips.

Continue reading »

What we call fundamental changes with time. Atoms were once thought to be fundamental, elementary building blocks of nature; protons were then thought to be fundamental, then quarks. Now we say the string is fundamental. So there still are fundamental building blocks: they are the different modes of the string.

- David Gross

“Strings” also happen to be the basic building blocks of computer languages.

In a somewhat humorous tone, I think this raises the following possibilities about the nature of the universe:

1. There is a God. He likes to mess with our heads.
2. Computer and Physics guys like to name things the same way.
3. We are living inside a computer program.

Seems only logical.

Blake

I am a terrible cook

Well, technically, I’m not terrible… A more apt description would be not a cook. I just usually get home and want to do other things.

Pretty much the same thing happens to me during lunch.

I’d just rather go eat somewhere. Their food is usually better than mine.

Continue reading »

This is my first blog entry. Look for lots of crazy, innovative, and funny ideas to come up on this blog. Some of them will be good, some of them will already exist, some of them will boggle your mind because they are so dumb. All in all, the site should either drive you crazy, or get you thinking. Hopefully the latter.

Enjoy,

Blake